Boyfriend Diary

Because after dating a plethora of doofuses, I met a man that isn't.

Today I am four.

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I’m not sure how old I am. I’d say I’d average a 27, but generally my age will range from 4 to 85.

Of the two extremes, I have absolutely no problem being granny, yet being four has its own problems.

I have yet to find the balance between being an egotistically driven, its my way or the high way, tantrum throwing, feet stomping four, and the world is a magical place four. Currently, my tendency leans toward naughty 4, where at some point after my bad deed in which I overreacted to a particular situation because it didn’t go my way (control issues much?), I experience explosive levels of guilt that may or may not have to do with me being Jewish.

Some guys can’t keep it in their pants, and I? Well, I just can’t keep it in my mouth.

I know that not everything I’m thinking should be expressed verbally, but oh, how I love to express everything that I’m thinking verbally when I’m upset. And let’s face it, even if I don’t say it, you’ll see it written in big scarlet letters across my forehead.

Guilt consumes me. Right now, I feel guilty because our Winter Wonderland weekend turned ugly for forty minutes. It could have been worse, but this incident could have also been avoided.  So where does this idea of a perfect relationship sans arguments come from? The movies? Do such relationships exist?

Naturally standing in this murky water won’t lead me anywhere, so I’m trying to waddle out of this psychological mess by writing and freeing myself of the guilt.

 

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Written by boyfrienddiary

January 31, 2011 at 3:32 am

Posted in Uncategorized

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